New year, new me? No, thank you! This is how I would reply to someone who asks me about my resolutions for the new year. January is a month filled with brand new resolutions, big promises, and a lot of talking about “new year, new me”. I have never liked all this talking about setting big plans for the year ahead and judging yourself for what happened in the past. I don’t like new year’s resolutions but I like the idea of a FRESH START, especially if this is something that gives you some extra motivation and makes you excited (and happy!) to take action!
Planning a resolution to me means you have a specific issue in mind and you need to sort it out (problem -> possible solution -> action plan) – I’m obviously not judging you if you want to set your resolutions for the new year and feel confident about your choice, but here there’s my advice for you:
- check if there is a real issue that needs a solution
- be sure about what you want to do/reach (does it really matters to you? Is something achievable? Is something you tried to do before?)
- break your plan into small steps: turn a bigger plan into actions that are small, simple, and easy to visualise
Let’s get back to the “no resolutions” approach…
From both a general point of view and in terms of “healthy resolutions”, can you see the difference between << I want to lose weight so I will do a diet in January >> and << lately I have been eating too many sweets because I look for them every time I’m stressed, so I want to use the idea of January as a fresh start to both find a way to de-stress and try new snacks BUT I won’t judge myself and I understand that eating some sweets when I’m stressed is not the end of the world. I also want to ask myself more often this kind of questions “what am I really hungry for? what am I looking for?” >>
The idea behind the first sentence is looking for a quick fix without questioning the resolution or asking yourself why you should do that and how you feel now or which benefits you will get from accomplishing this goal. Now read again the second sentence. Can you see how this one is not only more complete but is already getting you on a different pathway and motivates you to ask yourself more questions about that idea of losing weight? Because maybe you don’t even care about losing weight…
- There’s no need to COMPARE yourself to others
- It’s important to stay focused on what really matters TO YOU
- You don’t need to fit into a general resolution but what you should do instead is create INTENTIONS with a non-judgemental approach
- Create a POSITIVE CALL to change (as long as you need that change)
- Include in the foreseeable future what makes you HAPPY and what is rooted in SELF-LOVE
- An idea to use as a starting point: make a list “what you think you need to do vs what you really want”
- Big, bright and shiny resolutions are definitely attractive but WORKING ON YOURSELF is so rewarding in the long term!
WHAT AM I DOING IN JANUARY? It’s the beginning of a new year, I don’t feel guilty for what I have done or not done, eaten or not eaten during the last year or month… instead, I am trying to focus on all the positive things and on my motivation to take care of myself on a DAILY BASIS. I reflect on my past year and check from a different perspective the path that brought me here. I have learned some important lessons from my mistakes and I am ready to celebrate every little progress that will come. I am ready to…
- celebrate myself, my body, health, and well-being
- stay focused on my strengths and working on letting go of what is holding me back
- remind myself anytime I will feel lost that I AM ENOUGH
- allow myself to fully feel all the feelings
- stay focused on my path and ask myself anytime I get into the comparison trap “what exactly am I looking for?”
- be more focused on what I can ALLOW to come into my life/business, rather than on what I need to cut out (abundance vs restriction)
Each year will be different but right now these are the things I want to include into this “fresh start” because they are areas in which I need to work on. I’m not getting worried asking myself “will I manage to do all of them? Or even just one? What if I fail?” because I strive for progress and not perfection. I don’t have a real plan on how to put them into practice but I will simply keep trying what I have been doing lately and improve/change things step by step. Every day:
- I ask myself “what am I grateful for?” and try to write down as many things as I can remember – I will try to write down even more things even I had some bad days or a stressful time). I always try to ensure I’m not coming up with random things just because I need to make a list: it needs to be real GRATITUDE
- I stay focused on a word or a sentence that makes me feel empowered, and I come up with this by asking myself how I really feel
- I journal about my life and business goals, I ask myself questions, and I try to avoid being afraid of the possible answers I’ll find. A big part of this journaling work is related to my business because the mindset makes a huge part of having your own business, but you could totally do this simply staying focused just on your personal life (it depends from what you want to get from this work)
Join me on starting the new year with this SELF-LOVE revolution! And remember: it’s not about “new year, new me” – you just need to have a better look inside you and… BE READY TO SHINE!
Chiara x
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